We’re sparkling and we’re flat, thin but still fat

We’re fruity and we’re bready, willing and ready

We’re tame and we’re spicy, economic and pricy

We’re dry and we’re sweet, on the rocks or neat

We’re sour and we’re salty, hoppy and malty

We’re smoky and we’re roasty, earthy and toasty

We’re smooth and we’re silky, stouty and milky

We’re bitter and we’re creamy, luscious and dreamy

We’re subtle and we’re beasty, grainy and yeasty

We’re nutty and we’re woody, clean yet sooty

We’re floral and we’re tart, complex and smart

We’re heavy and we’re light, balanced and tight

We’re warm and we’re chilled, empty yet filled

We’re dark and we’re clear, we’re wine and we’re beer.

We’re the VE team, and our frogs are hoppin

Our stouts have cream, and our corks are stoppin

Our patio plants have flower power, and 3-7 is happy hour

We’re travelers of shandy, curious and tenacious

We’re crushers and destroyers, double and bodacious

We put the BS in KBS and the Hoe in Hoegarten

You say you want a Flounder’s porter, I beg your pardon?

We have seven daughters and two brothers; our house is pretty noisy

If you don’t like our Labrador or his lager, then you might like the framboysy

We’ll give you an old chub for only ten fidy

We’ll kick santa’s butt if he tries to get shitty

Our unearthly hop rockets make positive contact with a UFO

And from the southern tier to the north coast, hemp hop and rye continue to grow

Our steaks are Porterhouse, our seafood’s Oyster Stout

Cause we’re crabbies and lobster lovers with dogfish all about

On our left hand, our iron fist wears a velvet glove

And for 60-90 minutes we’ll give you victory summer love

Like Old Rasputin, we never say die

But eat our yellow snow, and you’ll be a deadguy

At 24 Knots, our dreadnaught on the heavy seas sets course

And our evil twin is a cereal killer and so is his dark horse

Inside our fat heads, our teeth are spooky

And on our flatbreads, there’s a fortune cookie

Like Major Tom, we’re brainless, and conduct ourselves as such

And we turn Dortmunder into Gold with our frightening Midas Touch

We’ll fight the moss back with a sharp panini crust

Cuz we’re zombie killers and peacemakers with belts made of rust

We used blackened voodoo to build a pyramid in seconds flat

While our talented Mr. orangutan pulls a duck rabbit out a magic hat

Our golden monkey is 400 pounds and swinging on a vine

And our golden hen lasts 400 rounds with a heavyweight wine

We’ll beat you wild black and you’ll beat us wild blue

Then we’ll all plead the fifth, and drink alimony ale brew

We nestle right by the fire while sipping Viking Blod

We wrestle down to the wire in Mississippi Mud

We drink old engine oil and wash it down with diesel

In our stockings we want lumps of coal, and the poop of a weasel

We’ll take you to strangeville, we’ll show you rivertown

We’ll send Commodore Perry straight to your livertown

On the beer school final we grade on a curve, and like any great drinkers, we go fast and swerve

We drink monk’s blood, monk’s stout, and monk’s brew from merry monks in monk’s café, and our monks always suffer serious sugar rushes on Barbados

We’ve tamed a yeti, speckled a hen, frosted a frog, paralyzed a fish, and quenched a really old brown thirsty flying laughing leghumpin sea dog

Yes, we’re raging bitches, and we’re double, oak-aged, lucky, dirty, arrogant, backwoods bastards

I’m Fat Head’s Holly Jolly PumpkinHead Ale.

You’re Left Hand Fade to Blackoutta Kilter Wee Heavy Seas Siren Noire J Rockers Son of a Peach.

But we’re all Bell’s Best Brown Stone Self-Righteous AleSmith Speedway Stoudt’s Fat DogFish Head Black and Blue Sunday Sour Black Jack Porterhouse Redstone Vertical Epic Straight Up Saison du Buffalo Bill’s Strawberry Blonde Bitches BrewKettle Ruddy Rye of the Tiger Lager of the LakeFront Organic E.S.B. Nektar Evil Geniuses!

Dave’s an engineer by day, and bartender by night

And Benny’s our enforcer, and destroyer of a flight

Nicole came here from Magic Tree, but we’ll have her all the same

And Justin loves his kitchen shifts, he thinks bartending’s lame

Frank the tank is doing theater and couldn’t be more cool

And Kari’s awesome wine taste treats are always making us drool

Lisa’s got that kind of laugh you have to call contagious

And when Jimmy gets excited you know he’ll be outrageous

If you know how to pour beer, Erika will mix you up

And if you have a boo boo, Dr. Dree will fix you up

Alecia’s mostly down the street, but she’s still one of us

And Michael has a big ass camera, that thing looks dangerous

Constance is off somewhere, dancing and blowing bubbles

And wines that have a screw off cap give Amanda all kinds of troubles

Graig’s our own jack-of-all-trades, and his tabs always linger

And Alyssa’s wearing woolen hats, and pulling Bob’s finger

Maegan’s working early, but a beaming smile is always showing

And Christopher never seems to know WHERE his flatbreads are going

John tries to act serious with his ninja turtles hat

And Dom’s over there flexing, with his 2% body fat

While Phill is sounding gongs, and playing the phooey board

Sandy knows the only glass in which a stout should be poured

Justin Powell’s a wrestler, and a lambic drinker of sorts

And there’s only three feet of snow outside, so James is wearing shorts

If you call Lindsey queenie, she’ll shoot daggers from the kitchen

And Amber will straight up kick your ass if you don’t quit your bitchin

Wendy is humming while making baskets and drinking beer at dawn

And Mark just wants this poem to end so he can get his flip cup on!

Behind us all is Bob and all the kegs he’s tappin, and the backs of our shirts say it clear:

While we might not quite make the magic happen, we’re damn sure proud to work here.

In first place:

Hoppin Frog Frosted Frog

In Second Place:

Southern Tier 2Xmas

In Third Place:

Fat Heads Holly Jolly

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And in no particular order you also sampled:
(in no particular order)

Many craft brewers put their life savings on the line because they have a dream and a deep passion for what they do. I have spoken to them and they tell me that they would rather be broke than not fulfill their vision. This kind of passion transcends itself into a great quality craft beer that no mass produced commercial beer can match. I feel the positive energy when I drink a craft beer. I hope you do too.

The third annual “Big Tap In” is coming quickly, April 21, 2012. It will be at The Covelli Center, downtown Youngstown. The VIP session (sold out) is from 1-6pm and the General Admission session is from 3-6pm. Tickets are available at Vintage Estate Wine & Beer – 7317 South Ave, Boardman, Ohio or at BigTapIn.com.

Hope we see you there!

There are only 7 active Trappist Breweries in the world. Orval, Chimay, Westvleteren, Koningshoeven, Rochefort, Westmalle and Achel. All are made in Belgium except for Koningshoeven which is made in Netherlands.

To be considered a Trappist brewery, there is very strict criteria. 1. The beer must be brewed within the walls of a Trappist monastery. 2. It must be completely controlled by the monastic community. 3. The economic purpose of the brewery must be directed toward assistance and not for profit.

There are many reasons these beers are so excellent. The main reason is that they have been doing it for centuries. Orval is the oldest of the brewing monasteries, founded in the 11th century. Achel is the youngest of the brewing monasteries. They have been brewing since 1656. So, all the other reasons for producing incredible beer are a result of centuries of experience. The secrets that are kept amongst the Monks have long been admired. I guess it might be easy for them to keep a secret since they vow to silence.
If you haven’t tried any of these incredible beers, do yourself a favor and taste a Trappist beer. I think you will be enlightened.

Special thanks to Drew for hooking us up with an awesome looking website. Check out this site over at 365beers.